Sidetracked: Part 1 Read online

  “So, you do realize it? Yet here you are, torturing yourself over a hot, rich, university guy. Why bother?”

  The line goes silent as I have nothing to say in my defense. I don’t know how Ice feels about me, so she’s not wrong, exactly, but he wants to hang out for some reason. And he revealed his big secret. Though, it’s hard to explain without mentioning things I shouldn’t.

  She gasps. “Did you have sex with him?”

  “N–no,” I stammer, my face catching fire.

  She bursts out laughing, but I guess it’s a valid question. If all Ice wanted out of me was sex—and it was something I considered after he first called—he’s dragging it out rather long. His intentions for our relationship are different, even if I still don’t understand what those intentions are.

  “Honestly, I haven’t once gotten the impression he’s interested in having sex with me.”

  “Maybe he’s not my dream guy, then,” she says, still cackling.

  Should I humor her...?

  I can’t mention immortals, obviously, but her general dating advice can’t be that bad, can it? Either way, she offered to help, and I should be happy with any advice I can get.

  I sigh. “Let’s assume you’re right—he’s only in it for the short-term. What should I do?”

  “Have fun! Seriously, Jay, you should try it sometime.” Of course, she’d say that. “On that note, you really should send me a picture of this guy. Y’know, just to confirm he’s as hot as you say.”

  “I’m not sure I should. You might try to steal him for yourself when you get back.”

  “Oh, come on. There’s no point in trying if he won’t even sleep with you,” she says, unable to keep from laughing between words.

  I cover my eyes, grateful for her sake she’s a thousand miles away. If we were together, I’d wring her horny neck in an instant. Take control of the situation—

  “Anyway, Rose! Let’s pretend that Ice has a secret. He’s cool and friendly and stupidly hot and all, but he also has this huge, weird, potentially problematic secret. Would you still go for it?”

  “Me?” she asks, falling quiet. “Well, unless his secret is that he moonlights as a serial killer, and he chose me as his next victim... Yeah. Definitely.”

  I wish I could tell her the secret, but this much is still useful. I mean, it’s safe to assume being a shapeshifter isn’t nearly as bad as being a closet serial killer.

  Though, he did admit to stalking me.

  “Okay,” I agree. “Why?”

  “You see, Jay, the situation you’re in is perfect. He’s a college student, right? And he’s going back to school in the fall, right? So, you can have a fun summer fling with this guy, okay?”

  “I’m following.”

  “Since he has to leave Riverview because of school, and you have to stay in Riverview because of school, and you both know that, there won’t be a messy breakup at the end of the summer. You’ll just go your separate ways. No big deal. As long as you don’t get too emotionally invested in this guy, it’s perfect. There are no strings attached.”

  No strings attached, huh? Ugh.

  She sounds so confident and matter-of-fact, I’d be convinced if I weren’t already too emotionally invested or caught up in a secret I can’t escape. Hm... Ice didn’t plan to tell me about immortals when we first met, but something changed his mind.

  What changed to make him want to tell me?

  “Honestly, I’m sure that’s all he’s after, anyway,” she continues flippantly. I open my mouth to respond, but she cuts me off with a gasp. “Oh my god. His secret isn’t that he has a girlfriend back in Stanford, is it?”

  “Um... No, that’s not it.”

  Well, he never said he doesn’t have a girlfriend. But I’d rather not consider the possibility.

  “Is he in a cult?” she asks instead.

  “Uh—” I mean, that might be closer to the truth, but—

  “Jayde, if he’s trying to convince you to join his cult, please resist.”

  “He is not in a cult.”

  She lets out a deep breath—as though she was legitimately afraid I was dating a cultist—and then laughs. Something about the depth of her relief concerns me.

  “Anyway... I don’t think it’s that bad, really, but it left me with a lot to think about. I haven’t been getting a ton of sleep.”

  “Oh, no. This isn’t like a Fifty Shades of Grey thing, is it?”

  I laugh. “No, I don’t think so.”

  “You gotta admit it kinda sounds like it,” she muses. “Rich, hot guy, always taking you out places and paying for everything. Hm. But, anyway... Yeah, if I were you, I would totally go for it. Do your thing. Take risks. Make mistakes. Just don’t fall head over heels for this guy. You’re way more sensitive than I am, but I think you can handle yourself.”

  Uh-huh... Don’t fall head over heels, she says.

  “It’ll be a good learning experience and build character, if nothing else.”

  “I guess I haven’t scared him off yet,” I say slowly.

  “That’s a start! Just trust your instincts, okay?”

  My instincts? The same instincts that told me to forgive him after he openly admitted to stalking me?

  She’s right, though.

  Until now, I never dated anyone I truly liked, and I never saw any of the guys I tried dating for more than a few weeks. I never did anything particularly fun or interesting with any of them either. It was always something like, “Let’s watch a game,” or “Let’s go to a party,” but I don’t care for sports or parties.

  It hasn’t been like that with Ice. I don’t mind going to the park or watching a movie or hanging out at his house. I know I shouldn’t fall too deep, but...

  “You probably won’t even go official,” Rose says.

  She’s trying to make me feel better, assuming whatever I do isn’t a big deal, but the truth is more...complicated? She couldn’t possibly understand there’s more on my mind than my relationship with Ice, and I can’t tell her.

  I say nothing and examine my hands. My cheap, silver nail polish is chipped around the edges—just like my life, apparently. It does nothing to help me feel less pathetic.

  “But, um...” She coughs. “When are you seeing him again?”

  “Tomorrow,” I mumble. “We’re supposed to talk more about his secret. I think.”

  “It’ll be fine, Jay. Don’t be so nervous!”

  “I’ll try.”

  “He asked you out first, right?” She laughs, her voice warm. “He’s obviously into you, so there’s nothing to worry about.”

  But why has he been asking me out? Is he into me? Does he even see what we’re doing as dating?

  Whatever.

  I sit up and rub my eyes. “I guess you’re right, Rose. Thanks for talking to me about it.”

  “No problem!” She’s always so cheery. “Let me know how it goes, okay? And please, please try to snap a picture of this guy for me. Even a creepy stalker pic is fine. I’m not kidding.”

  Yeah, right. That is not happening.

  “I’ll see what I can do,” I say mildly.

  “Awesome. I’ll text you tomorrow. Don’t forget to have fun!”

  Fun... Right.

  thirteen

  I DON’T HAVE A CHOICE, do I?

  It doesn’t matter if I agree to Ice’s ultimatum or not. Immortals will still exist, and that awareness will weigh on my mind until the day I die. Even if it has no impact on us seeing each other moving forward, I can’t just forget what he said.

  Either way, I feel weird dating a person if I can’t learn more about them—especially when it comes to something as important as their species.

  Is species even the right word?

  Maybe immortals are more like a variant of humans? I have no idea, but the way he changed clothes while transforming...

  Something to do with eye color...

  I can theorize all I want, but I won’t learn more unless I accept, and I hav
e to know. So, in truth, the decision was made the day Ice gave it to me. That’s how I feel, but...

  Is it worth it?

  A matter of legality and social status? What does that mean?

  Even if our relationship, whatever it is now, doesn’t outlive summer, this getting further involved with immortals deal surely extends far beyond Ice and his family. I doubt I can weasel my way out of it if things don’t work out between us.

  Even knowing that...

  If I want to satisfy my curiosity, there’s only one option.

  This is a risk I have to take.

  A knock on the front door startles me, and a glance through the window confirms the presence of Ice’s silver Porsche outside.

  He’s here. This is it. The point of no return.

  I slap a hopefully not-nervous smile on my face and answer the door. “Hey, Ice!”

  “Hello, Jayde.”

  My breath catches.

  He’s not wearing the typical casual yet slightly unseasonal clothing I’m used to. No dark jeans or leather jacket. Instead, he’s dressed in a similar fashion as during our tense dinner date: a dress shirt, tie, and slacks. His tie is loose, his collar unbuttoned, and his hair is pushed up and out of his face, held in place with some type of hair product.

  Whatever this look is, it’s hot.

  I stop gawking and invite him inside.

  He glances over the decor in the living room while I worry my hands and briefly explain the cottage’s layout. There’s not much for him to see. Rose and I are broke college students, and he knows it, but he’s obviously judging me based on the appearance of our house. He doesn’t seem particularly impressed either.

  At least it’s clean.

  After a moment spent examining a random Arizona-related knickknack on the bookcase beside the stairs, he turns and flashes a crooked smile.

  “Quaint,” he says simply.

  “Yeah, sorry. It’s not nearly as impressive as your parents’ place.”

  He shrugs, and I realize his comment may have been in reference to me calling him affluent. It is kind of funny.

  “Have you made your decision yet?” he asks.

  I nod, feigning confidence. “Yes. I want to learn more about immortals.”

  “Perfect. Glad to hear it.”

  His expression shifts, now seemingly guarded as he studies something else on the same shelf—a framed photo of me and Rose at our high school graduation, maybe? It’s hard to tell exactly what he’s looking at.

  “That said, if you ever find yourself regretting this decision, I want you to remember that I gave you a choice.”

  Okayyy... There’s still time to say no, Jayde.

  “Do you think I’ll regret it?” I ask with a timid laugh.

  “How am I meant to know what you may or may not regret?”

  He moves on to study yet another object on the bookcase, his expression once again mild. It’s a little frustrating.

  “It’s not like I can forget what you said or what I saw,” I reason aloud. “Now that I know, my life won’t return to normal even if I don’t accept your offer. Besides, I think I should learn more about immortals if we’re gonna keep hanging out like this.”

  “I see.” He turns away from the bookcase with an easy smile. “I assumed that would be the case.”

  Is he impressed? He sure doesn’t seem surprised.

  I scratch my arm. “What now? Time to sign my soul away?”

  “Not quite,” he says, laughing. “But there is something I need you to sign. Can you stay the night?”

  My face grows hot. I may have gasped audibly.

  “Stay the night?” I ask. “At your house?”

  What did Rose say about Fifty Shades of Grey?

  Oh my god. Stop thinking, brain.

  Ice hits me with a blank, blank stare.

  “It’s nothing inappropriate,” he says, his voice painfully dry. “The paperwork has to be approved in person. I’ll leave for Seattle first thing in the morning, but my visit will take some time. If you don’t mind, I would prefer you stay with the twins until then.”

  Oh.

  “Um, alright,” I say slowly. “I guess that’s fine.”

  Yeah... That’s totally normal and not weird at all.

  He flashes another smile. “I’ll wait here while you get ready.”

  WHAT ON EARTH DID I get myself into?

  Sitting in Ice’s car with a fat backpack on the floor between my feet, I stare at my lap and try to ignore the nagging sense that something isn’t right. I’ve known this guy for less than a month, and I packed enough that anyone watching could assume I’m moving in with him.

  He insists it’s nothing—the paperwork is standard procedure and staying at his house is merely a precaution—but this sure feels like something. The reason he told me about immortals in the first place? The reason he’s willing to go through so much trouble for someone he hardly knows and has no reason to trust with such an important secret?

  Surely, it can’t be nothing.

  We walk into the house together, entering through the garage. I drop my backpack in the den and catch Night watching me from the breakfast nook clear across the house. Ice notices her too, and they stare at each other, generating the same cool tension I sensed during my first visit.

  I desperately want to break the silence. But Ice asks me to collect the documents I brought before I can think of anything worth saying.

  “I’ll meet you in my room,” he says on his way out of the den.

  He sits across from his sister at the small breakfast table, where they speak in hushed tones. They both sound and look fairly annoyed—jaws tense and eyes narrowed. It’s none of my business, though, and the risk of involving myself in their family drama fills me with dread.

  I shuffle through the contents of my backpack, trying to find my wallet.

  For whatever reason, I had to bring my ID, birth certificate, Social Security card, and a voided check. It’s...strange, but I didn’t argue. I figure Ice knows what he’s doing. Not that it matters. I have to play along if I want to learn more about immortals.

  Found it.

  Glass clinks in the great room. The sound is gentle—like a cup tipping onto wood—but louder than their voices. I keep my eyes on my bag, suppressing the urge to peek over my shoulder.

  “Have you lost your damn mind?” Night asks, her voice low but raised enough to hear.

  My skin prickles. I zip my bag, scurry down the hall, and shut myself inside Ice’s bedroom, where I stay with my back pressed against the door.

  This feeling... The tightness in my chest.

  It reminds me of the way my parents acted toward each other in the months leading up to their divorce. The strange tension. The forced smiles. The uncomfortable, passive-aggressive dialogue. They tried to hide it by acting like everything was fine, but they never succeeded for long. The cracks were always there.

  It’s similar, but Ice and Night don’t seem to resent each other like my parents did. Maybe I’m reading into it more than I should? It’s probably nothing. Just her aversion to me having learned about immortals. Or...sibling rivalry.

  So, let it go.

  Stepping away from the door, I look around.

  Ice’s bedroom is just as tidy as it was the other day, but I soon detect an anomaly—a stack of paper on the desk. The paperwork he mentioned earlier, I assume. Inching closer, I make out ADULT APPLICATION printed across the first page in block letters.

  I drop my documents off to one side and sit in the leather chair in front of the thick packet.

  The U.S. Department of Human-Immortal Affairs is printed near the bottom of the page in a smaller font. I can only assume it’s a government organization based on the name alone, and the small seal beneath the title all but confirms it. A circle containing a lion and an eagle on either side of a shield with some sort of greenery bordering the edges.

  I stare at the stack of paper with dagger eyes, working up the courage to remove the c
over page. As my fingers brush paper, the bedroom door opens.

  It’s Ice, and I know it, but his arrival spooks me nonetheless.

  “You weren’t kidding about the paperwork,” I say.

  “No, but you can relax. I’m responsible for the bulk of it. You have a few things to sign, but I have to write an essay.”

  “You’re serious?”

  “Essentially.”

  If his heated conversation with Night bothered him, he doesn’t show it. He looks bored, almost. Maybe it wasn’t as serious as I thought. Maybe it was harmless bickering. Maybe it didn’t even have anything to do with me.

  “Shall we begin?” he asks with a muted smile.

  I glance at the daunting stack of paper. “Where do we start?”

  He closes the distance between us, stopping right beside me, and leafs through the papers. After he removes a thick, stapled packet from the bottom, I’m left with three individual sheets, including the cover page. He then opens one of the desk drawers, takes two pens from an organizer, and offers one to me.

  Our eyes meet as I accept the pen.

  His smile grows somewhat uneasy. “You see? This shouldn’t take you long at all.”

  Once he settles himself on the bed with his back against the wall and a clipboard in one hand, I return my attention to my share of the paperwork. I move the cover aside and find what appears to be a contract, rather vaguely titled Secrecy Agreement, underneath.

  According to the agreement, I shall NEVER discuss immortals or other “immortal-related topics” with “non-immortals” (i.e. other humans) unless they have also signed the same document or one covering similar terms.

  Fair enough, I guess.

  The U.S. Department of Human-Immortal Affairs reserves the right to access and modify the Subject’s personal information without advance notice or approval. Subject or Sponsor reserve the right to an appeal.

  What does that even mean?

  I continue reading and grow increasingly concerned.

  If I sign this agreement, the conditions span “the entirety of my natural life,” and breaching those conditions is severely punishable. Though, the document never clarifies what “severely punishable” means. Yikes.